Hi, Neighbor

     Well, would you look at this, (please do) two consecutive days of new posts by yours truly. I don’t know how or why it happened all of a sudden, after what has been a significant creative drought, but I can tell you a bit of the genesis for today’s issue. This morning as I crawled back into bed for what was to be a bit of a recovery from a terrible night’s sleep, a few inklings of an idea began forming and kept repeating themselves in my mind, I knew then that if I tried to take that nap those words would probably disappear forever. So, I forewent the sleep and went to work on this current masterpiece. Most of which is entirely fiction, I don’t have any neighbors named Jones, or Mrs. Dare for that matter (the names have been changed to protect the innocent, as they say on TV) and anyway, arrest records are generally sealed if you behave yourself for a specified period of time. But I digress, it took about an hour to come up with the first draft and about fifteen additional minutes just before it went to press for the final draft. Please remember that this is a work of fiction, I did mention that didn’t I?

     Every weekend should have a bit of good humor to it, if it is to be worthwhile and whether or not, this falls under that category remains solely up to you, the reader. Please get a chuckle if you will and let me know if you think that I, ah,  I mean the main character was punished excessively, or not, for his transgressions.

     Enjoy your weekend everyone,

Jake.

Whatta ya mean it's against the law to look?

Whatta ya mean it’s against the law to look?

Hi, Neighbor

Well, I’m sipping summer tea

just as sweet as it can be

while in a rocking chair

on the front veranda.

Now, I’d be rocking in the back

except for this one fact

that the police came

and read me my “Miranda’s”!

*

You see, there is this Mrs. Jones

who has fine parts upon her bones

who lives about

a hundred feet away.

Now, I won’t say I bore a torch

but while rocking on that porch

I noticed that a single tree

stood in my way.

*

As her bedroom window faced

with curtains sheer and laced

directly in my view

save for that tree,

so on a recent Saturday morn

when I knew that she was gone

I took out my trusty saw

and set it free.

*

Well, all went well you see

for about two weeks or three

each night I had the best seat

in the house.

That is until that day

when she chanced to glance my way

at the time she’d normally

remove her blouse.

*

And thus the glint off of my glass

then caused what came to pass

and the cops showed up at my place

in a trice.

And then they took me off to jail

and I had to go the bail

I had no idea they considered

this a vice.

*

So, since then I’ve planted trees

for hours on my knees

until I can’t see her house

for all the green,

and as I rock here in my chair

I still don’t think that it is fair

restraining orders puts such limits

on my scene.

*

The ankle bracelet is enough

and the time I spent in cuffs

should have been sufficient

price to pay.

But, now I’m forced to stare

at old and wrinkled, Mrs. Dare

in her see-through negligee

all night and day!

***

Jack Downing

Apr. 2016

Copyright© Jack Downing, aka Jake @poemsandponderings.wordpress.com. All rights reserved. Contents may not be

reprinted or disseminated in any manner without the expressed, written consent of the author. JRD. 4/22/26

 

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About poemsandponderings

Hearth and Health are wonderful things and if you're without either such sorrow that brings So I cannot express enough thanks to my Lord and to my family and friends for the support you afford! ~Jack Downing~
This entry was posted in humor, illegal, mischievious, misery, Neighbors, night shades, passion, Peeping Tom, poet, Poetry, Summer, warning, Why is it?, women and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Hi, Neighbor

  1. Beth Ann says:

    Your muse is back! I loved this one and it set my day off with a giggle thinking about you with an ankle bracelet on. Poor Jake. 🙂

  2. Oh, and the rocking chair didn’t? lol..Thanks Beth Ann as always I appreciate your valued input.You know as well as anyone how you can’t just let some (creative?) thought slip away without acting on it, or it is gone forever or at least loses some of its edge. Thanks again.

  3. Welcome back, Jake. This made me chuckle. I’m glad you set aside sleep to pen this humorous piece. If you hadn’t, the idea would have slipped away. I’ve been in the same position of having to rouse myself from bed to write how a story line or words, too, knowing full well if I didn’t, they would vanish in my sleep.

  4. Sarah Kelley says:

    A bit of the blarney I see!!

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