The Lost Wing Man

     As promised we are going to lighten up a little bit for the next few days, at least. Here is one of recent vintage, it’s a 2012 “Topo Gigio” (you’re really old if you remember Topo Gigio {sp?} on the Ed Sullivan Show) It is full bodied and it goes well with poultry. Please savor the moment, and enjoy.

Quench your thirst this Thursday,


I’m Hungry Now

The Lost Wing Man

The chili was hot

and the waitress was too,

but not in the sense

to attract me and you.

No, she was mad as a hornet

and ready to sting,

for someone had brought up

the ‘lost’ chicken wing.


She was otherwise sweet

and polite as can be

but mention that day

and all Hell is set free.

For the story it goes,

though it’s more now a fable,

of a wing that took flight

between kitchen and table.

While the cook it is said

had sworn there were five,

and knew none that could fly

as none were alive.

But the patron who sat

in the booth by the door,

had called all to witness

that the count be just four.

So suspicion had fallen

at the waitress’ feet,

as to what happened

to the vanishing meat.

Had she then dropped it

and kicked it away,

then set to retrieve it

later that day?


 She vowed that the plate

was the same all the way,

from the cook to the customer

and that was her say!

But the question remained

from that day to now,

when the waitress had bellowed

like a maddening cow.

It had been suggested

that she should retire,

but the owner, her husband,

knew his wife was no liar.

And so the diner that day

had eaten for free,

but the ‘lost’ wing it stayed

an unsolved mystery.

Then I noticed my friend

was chortling real hard.

“What’s up with you”

I asked of my ‘pard’?

He said he was there

when it happened that day,

and if I told of his secret

with my life, I would pay.

He said he was leaving

when she passed his way,

he said he couldn’t resist

and plucked a wing from her tray.

And so when he’d learned later

of the ruckus, it caused

he’d thought of the truth,

but mischief brought pause.

And so now, once in a while

he’ll let the words slip,

then he’ll sit back and chortle

as she loses her grip.

 If she only knew

I’m sure now, she’d swing,

at that cruel, thieving, bastard

who had purloined that wing.

Who had caused her such stress

for these past few years,

and nearly cost her, her sanity,

and a great many tears.

While that in itself

would be some fun to see,

discretion wins out,

’cause I got those four free!!



Jack Downing

Sep. 2012


Copyright© Jack Downing, aka Jake All rights reserved. Contents may not be reprinted or disseminated in any manner without the expressed written consent of the author. JRD 9/13/12






About poemsandponderings

Hearth and Health are wonderful things and if you're without either such sorrow that brings So I cannot express enough thanks to my Lord and to my family and friends for the support you afford! ~Jack Downing~
This entry was posted in Feast, humor, illegal, men, mischievious, no secret keep, poet, tears, truth, women and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The Lost Wing Man

  1. Beth Ann says:

    The purloined wing???? I think that might make a great book!!! 🙂 Made me chuckle several time this morning already! Thanks!!!!

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