The Gas Man Cometh

     A little humor for a Sunday morning. Remember, if you are not here, (within my range) it’s your lucky day. So if you find this offensive, it could be worse…trust me! A word to Billy Shakespeare… Eat your heart out! It’s mine, all mine.

    Have a Stinkin’ Good Sunday,


The Gas Man Cometh

 I have farted in Germany,

 I have farted in Spain,

 I have farted in New Hampshire,

 and I’ve farted in Maine.

 I’ve farted in Greece,

 and I’ve farted in France,

 and it goes without saying,

 I’ve farted in my pants.


 Yes, I broke wind in the open,

 I broke wind in a stall,

 I broke wind in the springtime,

 I broke wind in the fall.

 I broke wind and was happy,

 I broke wind and was sad,

 and it never smelled good,

 just some, not so bad.


 Well, I’ve let out a boomer,

 a squeaker, a squirt,

 I let out a walk-away,

 and a few, that have hurt.

 I’ve let gas in Virginia,

 left gas in Rhode Island,

 and I let gas that has left,

 just one person, smilin’!


 Jack Downing

July 2011










About poemsandponderings

Hearth and Health are wonderful things and if you're without either such sorrow that brings So I cannot express enough thanks to my Lord and to my family and friends for the support you afford! ~Jack Downing~
This entry was posted in history, humor, life, reflections, warning. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to The Gas Man Cometh

  1. Beth Ann says:

    Seriously??? I mean really??? I am so NOT going to link to your blog today!!! I guess after all that Native American week you felt like you had to let off some……..wait for it………gas. 🙂

    • C’mon, that was funny and you know it…And by the way every word of it was the ‘I kid you not’ Truth. And I’m considering a lease to the Government. Either as an energy source, or a weapon of mass destruction. It’s a win(d)-win(d) situation! Jake

  2. Sounds like you could solves the nation’s energy problems. Or is that smells like?

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