The Gas Man Cometh

     A little humor for a Sunday morning. Remember, if you are not here, (within my range) it’s your lucky day. So if you find this offensive, it could be worse…trust me! A word to Billy Shakespeare… Eat your heart out! It’s mine, all mine.

    Have a Stinkin’ Good Sunday,

    Jake.

The Gas Man Cometh

 I have farted in Germany,

 I have farted in Spain,

 I have farted in New Hampshire,

 and I’ve farted in Maine.

 I’ve farted in Greece,

 and I’ve farted in France,

 and it goes without saying,

 I’ve farted in my pants.

 

 Yes, I broke wind in the open,

 I broke wind in a stall,

 I broke wind in the springtime,

 I broke wind in the fall.

 I broke wind and was happy,

 I broke wind and was sad,

 and it never smelled good,

 just some, not so bad.

 

 Well, I’ve let out a boomer,

 a squeaker, a squirt,

 I let out a walk-away,

 and a few, that have hurt.

 I’ve let gas in Virginia,

 left gas in Rhode Island,

 and I let gas that has left,

 just one person, smilin’!

 

 Jack Downing

July 2011

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

    

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About poemsandponderings

Hearth and Health are wonderful things and if you're without either such sorrow that brings So I cannot express enough thanks to my Lord and to my family and friends for the support you afford! ~Jack Downing~
This entry was posted in history, humor, life, reflections, warning. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to The Gas Man Cometh

  1. Beth Ann says:

    Seriously??? I mean really??? I am so NOT going to link to your blog today!!! I guess after all that Native American week you felt like you had to let off some……..wait for it………gas. 🙂

    • C’mon, that was funny and you know it…And by the way every word of it was the ‘I kid you not’ Truth. And I’m considering a lease to the Government. Either as an energy source, or a weapon of mass destruction. It’s a win(d)-win(d) situation! Jake

  2. Sounds like you could solves the nation’s energy problems. Or is that smells like?

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